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Singer-songwriter Erin Enderlin took to the Grand Ole Opry stage on June 28 to debut a moving new song, “When You Look At Me,” co-written with veteran couple Tanja Struyck-Fogleman and Brent Fogleman. The performance was made even more meaningful by the presence of her co-writers in the audience—both combat veterans—who collaborated with Enderlin during a SongwritingWith:Soldiers retreat hosted by the Boulder Crest Foundation.
The song, which speaks to the often invisible emotional burdens veterans carry, offers a vulnerable and honest look into the ongoing process of healing. Written from the perspective of someone navigating trauma and finding strength in vulnerability, “When You Look At Me” emphasizes the importance of acknowledging that it’s okay not to be okay.
“When you look at me / There’s a whole lot that you don’t see / I’m walking round in memories you don’t know nothing about / Sometimes I’m not okay, and I need that to be okay / Know that I’m finding my own way / When you look at me.”
The recorded version of “When You Look At Me”—featuring Randy Houser—will be released on YouTube July 4 as part of SongwritingWith:Soldiers’ new music programming.
“Writing ‘When You Look at Me’ through SongwritingWith:Soldiers wasn’t just about music—it was about being seen and heard in a way we hadn’t been before,” said the Foglemans in a statement. “Erin didn’t just write with us—she truly listened. That song became part of our healing. We hope it reminds others that it’s okay not to be okay—and that even in the hardest moments, there’s a better way to struggle.”
Enderlin, a longtime advocate for songwriting as a tool for storytelling and healing, reflected on the experience:
“Tanja and Brent are amazing, and they were so open and willing to share,” she said. “While this song is personal to them, I think a lot of people will see themselves or people they love inside these lines. I hope this song reminds us to be kind to one another and remember we don’t always see what’s beyond the surface.”
Founded in 2012, SongwritingWith:Soldiers has helped connect over 6,000 veterans and military families with professional songwriters, fostering creativity and connection through shared musical expression. The organization continues to host retreats across the U.S., using the power of music to honor stories, support healing, and build community.
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