Hello everyone. This is my first visit to the site, but i am so glad i found this forum. I've been needing someone to talk to about my situation, so maybe by talking to the Nashville community, i can get a better understanding. First of all, i'm a professional singer/songwriter, married, mom of 2 beautiful girls. I've been married for 9 years now. Six of those 9, i quit singing for a while, just due to life happening. 2 years ago, i got back to my music career. If it's truly in your heart, it's in your blood too, as in my case. So i couldn't quit doing something that i love. I've been singing since i was 18, but now time is creeping up on me, and i'm getting older. Though i have made some awesome connections to the music industry, i also realize that living in the same town i grew up in, will get me nowhere. I have paid my dues across East Texas, but i know i have to pay my dues in Nashville too. Every year i feel a little older, but this year i really thought long and hard about this. I have always wanted to live in Nashville, whether i sang or not. Nashville is where i'd love to raise my 2 girls. I've always felt like there's nothing here for me and my family. Not that it's a bad town, but i know Nashville would be a million times better than staying here.
Now here's where i'm facing trouble. Me and my husband are having a conflict about it, because he will NOT leave this area. Now this is what i do not understand, because he wasn't even born here. His hometown is in Louisiana, and the only reason he moved here is because he married me. Okay, not that he ever cared much about my music at all. He only likes the older style country, such as Hank Williams, etc., other than that, he listens to Rock music. No big deal, i do too. But he just hasn't been supportive of my music since i've known him. There have been times where he's said he was proud of me, but not much beyond that.
His excuse for not wanting to move?? Okay, he works for the railroad, Union Pacific. He's been with them for about 4 years now. In his job, he gets "seniority", based on how long he's been there, etc. He has already moved up in his seniority, since he's been with them. Everytime i've mentioned Nashville, his face falls, and i hear every excuse you can think of. "Someone has to make the living here"......"I have a job that i can't leave"...."You should have thought about this when i didn't have a job"......"If i move, i will lose my seniority".......Well, excuse me, but i thought there were other railroad companies in the world. LoL Isn't there a railroad company near Nashville, if not Union Pacific? Even when my heart is breaking about this...He shoves it aside and walks away. Like tonight, my tears did not mean a thing. He wanted to know what was wrong. When i told him, he got mad and said "well if you're that miserable, take off to Nashville then". I told him next time not to ask what was wrong, he said i am like this all the time. Of course, not that our marriage is perfect. We have had problems, so maybe that is why he's not interested in wanting to move. But i thought maybe it would even give us a new start. Maybe it is time for me to walk away, and do this on my own. I just didn't want to separate myself and my girls from him. I was giving him the chance to be a part of his family. But we have had issues for the past 3 years because he basically lives in his room, on one side of the house, and rarely comes out. He eats, sleeps, and watches t.v. back there. He might come out for 15 mins. a day, but that's it.
Can someone give me advice? Do i walk away and go on to Nashville on my own? without him?? It seems i cannot convince him to leave, which makes me wonder why he is staying here, when he's not even from this area. ?? Should i quit trying to convince him, or even try to make the marriage work again? Every day i'm a little more sad that i'm not living where i want to, and stuck in this town. I told him tonight......It's heartbreaking that he will not be a team with me on anything i want. If anyone can advise me, please do. I am just very sad most of the time, that he will not even give an ounce of himself for me, just this once. Is it me that's being selfish? I do face the reality that moving to Nashville still might not bring me closer to my dreams of a career. However, i will never know unless i go and try. And every time i'm a year older, i think about this. I just don't want to be sitting here, still "thinking about it" a year from now. thank you for any advice. Note to add: His main excuse for not moving, is that he'll lose his seniority. However, i asked him if i move, where will he go? he said he will move back to Louisiana and work at the railroad there. He claimed he wouldn't lose his seniority there. What is the difference in states? We live in Tx., so i dont see the difference if he were to move to TN vs Louisiana. Somehow i think he is just handing me a line, and i am wasting my time waiting on him.